Home Run Derby No Longer

I have, as of this morning, written an email to my good friend Bud Selig requesting that he do away with the term home and replace it with Josh Hamilton. No longer will you hear, "Oh what a monstrous home run!" or "He just hit a walk-off HOME RUN to end the ball game!" Now, it will sound like this, "Oh my, what a monstrous Josh Hamilton!" or "I have never seen a Josh Hamilton hit that far before!" or when Hamiton hits one, "Josh Hamilton just JOSH HAMILTONED to win game 7!" No more home run derby, now we shall have the Josh Hamilton derby, where one Josh Hamilton after another is launched over the fence. And, one more new rule, to advance to round two, one must hit 28 Josh Hamiltons or JHs in the first round, or they may not advance. And if no one advances, then Josh Hamilton automatically wins by default.

Now, some of you out there may read this and say to yourself, "This guy is completely out of his mind. He's just a crazy Ranger's fan who finally has something to cheer about." Well, well, well. While that may be exactly the case, I would to point out that Josh Josh Hamiltoned further that Babe Ruth ever did in Yankee Stadium and he has his own candy bar. So, I don't think my request is too far fetched. That's pretty much all I have to say today, you can either agree with me or be wrong, whatever.

Peace y'all.


2 Responses to Home Run Derby No Longer

  1. Richard Says:
    Who am I to argue? Just another crazy Ranger's fan that is glad they finally have something to cheer about and it is about the most exciting thing since Nolan's 7th no hitter. Did you realize that Nolan had 5 games that were no hitters into the 9th inning? He was that close to 12 no-no's.
    And now Josh Hamilton that stat
  2. Lindsay Says:
    I totally agree!!! Josh Hamilton is amazing! =D